Synopsis of Love on Holiday

Written by Jennifer W.

The show opens with everyone hanging out at the bar. Larry is singing "Sherry Darling" by Bruce Springsteen. (Sample of the lyrics: Now Sherry my love for you is real, But I didn't count on this package deal, And baby this car just ain't big enough for her and me.) Kimmy asks if he is singing about her and Mommy. Her Mom says that it sounds right on point. Nelle states that Larry is actually a pretty good singer. Ally day dreamingly replies that he is good. Ling rolls her eyes at Ally and utters "gross" under her breath. Kimmy realizes that Larry IS singing about her and Mommy. Her eye starts to twitch, her Mom's eye starts to twitch, and Cage's lip starts to quiver.

At the girl's weekly sleepover, they are all sitting on Ally's bed talking. Ling says to Ally, "It's not natural that you haven't slept together yet." (She is referring to Ally and Larry's relationship.) Ally asks why. Lings states that they have been together for over a month. Elaine interjects that not every couple just jumps right into bed. Ling says, "Oh that's right Elaine, you wait and count to three first. I forgot." Nelle says that she doesn't think a relationship should be about sex but if he doesn't want it... Ally assures everyone that he wants it. Ling casually says "just not from you." Ally replies, "Alright look, when one of you meet the right man, which none of you have, except for maybe you Ling. I actually do believe that Richard is your perfect soul mate. You do not rush it. You hold longing stares and have an extended courtship. You become patient and when you know that it is right, you don't race. I love where I am with Larry at this moment and I am not going to have these times pre-empted by a horny moment." Just then a male blow-up doll inflates in Ally's bed and everyone is in shock. Ally stammers as she tries to explain what it is and why it is in her bed but can't quite find the right words. She just covers her mouth in disbelief.

The next day at the morning meeting, Fish reminds everyone about the charity auction tomorrow. No one is happy about this. Fish tells them that it is one day for a good cause and that this year he thinks "it is cripples". He puts names in a cup and the first woman and first man picked have to participate. He picks his name first and immediately puts it back in the cup and says "do-over". Everyone says nuh-uh. He says fine. The first woman he picks is Nelle. "Oh yuck", says Nelle. Fish asks Ling to bid on him because he doesn't want to be "stuck with a beast". As Fish tries to go to the next item on the agenda, Cage interrupts and asks Ally if her little squeeze box was making fun of his and Kimmy's situation last night. He repeats some of the lyrics and says that he does not appreciate that kind of garbage. Ally replies, "Bruce Springsteen wrote that song and I don't think he had you in mind at the time." John responds, "Oh yeah, yeah. Get flippant. That will mitigate the offense just fine." Nelle puts her two cents in by saying, "He marked on John's turf." "Yeah we don't need to hear from you either Goldilocks", John replies. Elaine walks in and says they "are being sued by the Peanut -- sexual harassment". The Peanut, as Fish explains, is a little librarian clerk that left about a year ago. He wonders why he is suing for sexual harassment and if anybody at the firm harassed him. All the woman say "yeah right". Elaine says, "Well...". Fish says he is tired of getting sued for this and assigns Ling and Mark to the case.

John goes to his office and puts on his oversized boxing gloves. He starts boxing in the air as Ally walks in. Ally says that she thinks John knows that Larry was not ridiculing him and Kimmy when he was singing his song at the bar. John replies, "Maybe I was feeling deserving of ridicule. I am a grown man. I am dating a women who takes her mother on dates. I mean , what the hell is that!?!?" Ally asks if her mother came along on the first couple of dates. John says no, but once a relationship deepens, she becomes more prone to emotional intimacy...and then she needs Mommy Dearest. Ally says that it is obvious he cares about Kimmy, he even went as far as pretending to be a rock and roll singer, and maybe he should just talk to her about this and say that the mother is acceptable for holidays but not dates.

In Fish's office they are going over the court papers for the sexual harassment suit. The court papers say that Elaine repeatedly offered to have sex with the Peanut. Elaine says that he knew she was joking. "We are friends and this just doesn't make any sense." The papers also say that Elaine made him eat her underwear. Elaine explains that she would demonstrate her inventions for him and once she had an invention for edible cherry flavored underwear so she offered them to him as a light snack. Fish fires Ling from the case and says that this is a real lawsuit and the Peanut has a legitimate case. He tells Mark to hire Larry Paul for the case to represent Elaine. Cage looks at Elaine and says that he is very disappointed.

Nelle is in the unisex brushing her hair when Ling enters and greet her by saying "Hey bitch, what's up?" Nelle comments that Ling seems really happy. Ling is happy because she is no longer on the Peanut case and asks Nelle to go shopping. Nelle says she might as well go to find something for the auction tomorrow. Sensing Nelle's reluctance, Ling says that it is for a good cause and maybe someone rich and handsome would bid on Nelle. Ling remarks, "Can you imagine how much money I would bring in?" Nelle answers, "No Ling, how much?" Ling just gives a look. Nelle bets whatever is bid on Ling that Ling's bid won't be as much that is bid on her. Ling gives Nelle this "I don't want you to be embarrassed" look. Nelle says that since Ling is "God's gift" then she shouldn't be afraid to make the bet. Ling wants to know how she can be sure Nelle won't recruit someone to bid for more than Nelle is worth. Nelle stands up straight and says, "Here is a flash! I will have you know that men go nuts for me. I admit that you have the whole dark hair, exotic thing going for you but when it comes to a man's true fantasy, I am it. I am tall, gorgeous, and I look like I have brains which I in fact do have. And you? You are short and you bite." Nelle chomps her teeth. They give each other a showdown stare.

Ally is walking alone on the busy street and literally bumps into Larry. They both realize they were on the way to the other's office. Larry says that he sees potential in them being a good couple and he touches her ear. Ally asks him what he is thinking. He states that he doesn't believe in the "telling each other what they are thinking thing" and that "over-talking can make you lazy". Ally doesn't understand what he is trying to say. He says part of communication is silent body language, mood, greeting each other. And that some things should be figured out instead of flipping to the back page for the answers. Ally realizes that she is having trouble reading him. He says that he will tell her one thing, "Standing here...right now...I am totally...freezing. Let's go". Ally smiles and Larry says that they should go to her office because he has a meeting there for the sexual harassment lawsuit.

Daniel (Peanut), his lawyer, Mark, Larry, and Elaine are meeting in the conference room. Daniel says that he finds the name "Peanut" insulting. Mark says that he understands it has been his nickname his entire life. Daniel says that yes, but it didn't mean he had to endure it while working for Cage/Fish & Associates. Mark says, "But you are suing her for what she did". Before anyone can respond, Daniel's lawyer says that since Cage/Fish & Associates want to depose this case they should present an offer and that he is uncomfortable letting his client speak freely. Elaine addresses Daniel and says that they are friends. Daniels' lawyer interrupts, while fidgeting in his chair, "Oh, no. I cannot allow that. I am not comfortable. If you would like to get a deposition then you will have to come up with a stenographer tomorrow." Larry agrees.

After the conference, Larry comments to Mark that he feels there is something more to the case. He and Elaine were friends a week ago and a week later he is suing her? John is walking by and trips over Larry. John mentions the song Larry performed and says that he does not appreciate his little "package deal" number and that if he sings it again, John will have something to say about it. John walks away.

John is heading back to his office just as Kimmy is stepping off the elevator. Kimmy says that she rushed right over because John said he needed to talk to her. Of course, her mother is in tow. They all go into John's office. John says that he would like to speak to Kimmy alone. Kimmy suggests that her Mommy could facilitate if there is a problem they need to discuss. John matter of factly states that Mommy IS the problem. He adds, "I really do not need or want an emotional chaperone. I am a big boy. You're a big girl. And I think we can navigate this terrain without Mommy." Kimmy's eye starts to twitch. Her Mom asks John if Kimmy can take some time to think about this. John says fine and as soon as they leave, he starts punching the air.

Fish asks Ling why she is in the charity auction. Ling says, "What can I say? My heart beats for philanthropy." Not buying it, Fish asks what is really going on. "That bitch Nelle thinks she can raise more money than me!", Ling replies. "Do you think she can?" Fish mumbles, "Well, that is a tough one. Out of all the women I have paid for, the blondes have been more expensive...but they don't have your warmth." Ling growls and gives him the evil eye.

At the deposition for the case against Elaine, Daniel says that Elaine had him try on the face bra she invented. Larry asks if the bra had any sexual connotation whatsoever. Daniel replies no, but it is still a bra. Larry asks him if Daniel and Elaine have been friends over the last year and Mark continues asking if they have gone out to dinner on occasion. Daniel answers yes to both questions. They then ask what changed between them that would end their friendship a week ago. Daniel says that he was traumatized by one of her inventions. The Vi-Bra. He says he can't even look at another woman's breast without experiencing vertigo. Mark asks, "What the heck is a Vi-Bra?" Before Elaine can explain, Daniel says that it is a device specifically designed to titillate and he knew he had to leave the firm when Elaine demonstrated that one for him.

Mark, Larry, and Elaine are in a conference room alone and Elaine is explaining and demonstrating how the Vi-Bra works (she is wearing one). It is controlled by a remote that makes the breast move up and down, left to right, or in a circle, together or in different directions. It can augment the nipples or the breast size. (The demonstration is hilarious, by the way!) Larry is shocked that Elaine invented this. She says that there are still a few wrinkles - cell phones. She picks up a cell phone, dials, and the Vi-Bra starts moving on its own in all different directions.

At the auction, Nelle is up for bids. Bids are going up from $3000. Renee comments that she is way over-priced. Ally says that Nelle does look pretty good. Renee wants to leave because she is bored. Ally reminds her that they are there to bid on Richard because he is afraid of who will bid on him or of not getting bid on at all. Renee asks how high they can go. "He said we can go up to $1000." Nelle ends up getting bid on by a hottie for $6000.

Lynnie, Kimmy's mother, visits John in his office. "Obviously Kimmy has severe social issues", she begins. She tells him that Kimmy is in therapy. And that she thinks John sees the beauty of her daughter beneath all of her idiosyncrasies. She is there to beg for John's continued tolerance regarding the situation. John says he realizes everyone has their little quirks but he doesn't understand how one can carry on a relationship under these circumstances. Lynnie suggest that all you have to do is try and they should all meet that night to "talk it out". John says that Kimmy (without Lynnie) can talk it out with him. "She can either learn to trust me, or not." Lynnie thanks John for seeing her.

Richard is up for bids next. Bidding starts at $500. Ally bids for him. The bids are consistently going up but he us being bid on by MEN! When the bidding gets steep, Ally says to Renee that she was only authorized to bid $1000. Richard is sold for $6500 to the great looking guy in the front. Richard looks like he is going to be sick. The guy winks at Richard ;-)

Next up is Ling. She comes out in a flirtatious skirt and top. Everybody is cheering. Bidding starts at $5000! The bids keep going higher and higher. Ling is sold for over $30,000.

Nelle brings her charity auction date to her office. She acts very disinterested. She says that she can talk for about five minutes to make the date official but that's it because her work is very backed up. The guy can't believe it. Nelle asks if she is really expected to go on a date with a guy who bids on women at auctions. He says if he can allow himself to go out with someone who let's herself be bought... Nelle replies that that was for charity. They trade quips back and forth. Nelle saying that she can help him out by throwing him out of the window. He by saying that Nelle is so funny he forgot to laugh. Nelle then offers to give him a nice little hug and quick peck for his $6000. The hug is cold and the kiss is quick. She sits back down at her desk and starts working. He says he apologizes because he didn't realize. Nelle asks what he is referring to. He says that he didn't realize she had an intimacy disorder. Of course, Nelle says that she does NOT have an intimacy disorder. And she tries to prove it by giving him a kiss. He kisses her back and Nelle is speechless because it was so good. All she can say is "Wow!"

Nelle and her date are having lunch and they realize three hours have gone by. Nelle asks him if he is dying because she gets this strange feeling that she is never going to see him again. He says no. Nelle says that it is very unusual for her to blow off work and to actually have feelings, primal feelings, and she is not sure if she likes having them. Her date asks if she was to never see him again, how would she want to spend the evening? Nelle wonders why he says that but he blows it off and says that he has always believed that you should live life like there is no tomorrow. Nelle kisses him passionately.

In the unisex, Nelle is telling Ling about her date. She is all giddy and says, "Can you believe I did that and I wanted to do more?!?!" Ling says, "No." Nelle says that it is not like her to feel "hot" and that she may even enjoy... "SEX?", Ling finishes. Nelle says that she doesn't even know him. "He is rich and he is a doctor. What else is there to know?", Ling asks.

Richard runs into the unisex and asks Ling for help. He says that Paul, the guy who won a date with him at the auction, gets to pick the date location and he picked the bar. Ling tells Richard not to worry, they will all be there to rescue him. Fish says the problem is being seen on a date with a man. Nelle interjects that she will be there with her date. "If not in a hotel room", Ling mumbles. Nelle looks embarrassed. Paul thinks that Richard is special. This makes Richard really worried. Totally ignoring Richard, Ling asks Nelle if she is falling in love. Richard walks away. Nelle wonders if she should wear a different dress tonight.

John and Kimmy are talking about their situation. Kimmy suggests that her mother sit at a different table so it won't seem like she is out with them. John says that she can't be there at all! Kimmy says that her problem borders on a disorder. John asks her if she has ever been with a man. "Of course not. I am chaste", Kimmy replies. "Is your acute sense of morality a convenient way of dealing with your intimacy problems?", John asks. "Perhaps" is her reply. John tells her that it is time for her to take the leap. She asks if John will catch her. John can only say that he will try. Kimmy's eye starts to twitch. John's lip starts to quiver.

Mark tells Elaine that they are going to settle the case. Elaine agrees and then asks Mark if everything is OK. He says he is fine but when Elaine asks him to dinner, he distractingly replies yes. Elaine ask him again what is going on. Mark says that his problem is with this (he turns on the Vi-Bra Elaine is wearing). He states, "I enjoy promiscuity a lot more when it is coming from someone I am not dating." Elaine says this is who she is (she turns off the bra) and if he chooses to date her, he has to accept it. A cell phone rings and Elaine's bra starts going off in all directions.

Larry, overhearing Mark and Elaine's conversation, asks Mark if he and Elaine are dating and when did it start. Mark replies that they had been dating since last week but he guesses that good things must come to an end.

Ally comes out of her office and bumps into Larry. Ally admits to Larry that she has been missing him. Kimmy interrupts their conversation and says that she has agreed to go on a date with John but she needs Ally there as a surrogate. "Surrogate mother?", Ally asks. Kimmy says that the truth is, Ally gives her balance. Larry says that they will be there. Kimmy is delighted. Larry asks Ally why, whenever he is at Cage/Fish & Associates, he feels like he is walking in during the middle of a movie? Ally says she will fill him in.

At the bar, Nelle is having a great time with her date. He says that they have known each other for 10 hours and 13 minutes. She is happy he is counting the minutes but asks why. "Long story", he says. Paul, Richard's date, is asking Richard to dance. There is a slow song playing and Richard says he will dance when a fast song plays. Paul reminds Fish that he paid $6500 for him. "I am homophobic. I can show you a note from my doctor", Richard says. A fast song comes on and Paul drags Richard to the dance floor. Ling excitedly tapes the whole thing. When the song goes back to being slow, Paul pulls him in for a slow dance. Fish has no idea what to do.

John and Kimmy are dancing. Kimmy says she is "coping" without having her Mommy there. John then notices Lynnie in disguise over at a table. He gets upset and asks Kimmy if she knew about her Mommy being there. Kimmy says nothing so he walks away.

Nelle asks Paul about not being able to see him again after tonight. He admits he is going to prison tomorrow for a life term. He was convicted of euthanizing his ASL patient.

Nelle is visibly shaken about the news about Paul and is talking to Ling about it. Ling asks her if she is ok. Nelle replies, though not convincingly, that she is fine-it's not like she fell in love with him in one day. Ling says that sometimes you do fall for someone in a day. Ling suggest Nelle visit him while he is away. Nelle says that he doesn't want that and he spent his last day of freedom with her because he didn't want to be treated like a victim.

Kimmy and Lynnie are in John's office. Kimmy admits that she just needs her Mommy there in the room with her. John says that he puts honesty above chastity. Kimmy apologizes to him. He says that he doesn't think it is going to work out between them. "Just like that? Are you dismissing me?," Kimmy asks. "Without prejudice", John replies. Kimmy kisses him goodbye. Then Lynnie kisses him goodbye.

Daniel admits he brought on the lawsuit because it bothered him that he was the only guy Elaine didn't want to sleep with. He says that Elaine treated him like a pet. Elaine tells him that just because she is perceived as a promiscuous women doesn't mean that she is. She admits she does things for attention. She asks him if he brought on the lawsuit to get himself noticed. He says no, but it just really bothered him that it seems like everyone is Elaine's type but him. And that feeling hurts.

Nelle walks in during the sentencing case of her date, Dr. Barrett. His lawyer says that Dr. Barrett's act was of mercy and to spare a patient's intense suffering. The judge understands, but pursuant to the statute, she is left no choice but to sentence him to a life term. The judge asks the bailiff to take him into custody. Dr. Barrett hugs his Mom and Dad before being led away. He sees Nelle and smiles at her.

Ally and Larry are discussing the sexual harassment suit. "The Peanut loves Elaine?", Ally asks Larry. Larry responds, "Seems so. We settled it so Richard is happy." Larry doesn't let on that Mark and Elaine were dating and that is how he figured out how Daniel felt and why he filed the suit. Larry says that he knows Ally must be wondering why things between them haven't accelerated very fast. He really liked when he opened up to her last week about some feelings. "It was exhilarating...and a little scary." He says he is really excited over their relationship and where it seems to be going. Ally says that she understands he wants to take it really slow because he wants it to be right. And that she doesn't mind taking it slow. She whispers that they are going to get there and they should enjoy the ride.

Richard is wearing a cap and sunglasses in an effort to be incognito. When someone knocks on his office door, he hides under the desk (thinking it may be Paul). "One date with a gay man and you are already going under desks?", says Cindy. She admits she orchestrated those men to bid on Richard to get him back for what happened between her and Mark. She came to apologize because she said it was a cruel joke. He can't believe she spent $6500 to do that to him. She says that is how much his homophobia hurt her. Richard gets excited at the fact that Paul was a plant and that he was probably not gay. He takes off his sunglasses. "No. He is gay", says Cindy. Richard puts his sunglasses back on.

As Cindy is leaving the office, she bumps into Mark. They exchange pleasantries and Mark asks if she is seeing anyone. She says no. She asks if Mark is seeing anyone. He says well, kind of. (Elaine is sitting right there within earshot, watching them.) Things are slightly awkward between Mark and Cindy. Cindy wishes Mark a Merry Christmas and walks away. Mark watches as she leaves. Seeing Elaine he walks over and asks her to dinner. Elaine says no, because after seeing the way he was with Cindy she realizes that he still has feelings for her and that he is on the rebound.

John sits in his office thinking about his relationship with Kimmy. Kimmy and Lynnie are walking down the street and Lynnie is comforting her. Ally is cooking dinner for Larry at her apartment. They are slow dancing, smiling, and kissing with smiles on their faces. Cindy is walking alone on the busy street. Elaine is leaving the office and contemplating the lawsuit and her relationship with Mark. Nelle is watching Paul being led away in handcuffs to prison.

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